i'm bored.. i noe i shdn't be wasting me time nuaing away and i shd be doing more readings for tml's interview.. i duno wat kind of info shd i look into... now everything seems kind of boring to me.. i guess this is the aftermath of ydae vball.. intense muscle ache tho i've been playing constantly at least for each week..
waiting.. for a call from a company.. which i think its qt interesting tho its zero relevance to my majors... its 3+ already.. so i guess.. its getting far already.. wells.. aft so many times.. think i have no difficulty pulling myself back.. sort of numb already.. got to find many others again.. oh wells...
went to watch Time Traveler's Wife today with mich.. it was a story abt waiting.. i wouldn't say tt the movie is terrific.. but somehow it has the power to capture our attention for the whole movie.. somehow i guess time travelling is a blessing to the guy in the sense tt he sees alot of things which he can't given to his lifespan of 43 years... tho the wife have to wait for him.. and she have to deal with unexpected times when he has got to time travel.. she managed to see and touch him even after his death(cos he time traveled to the past).. so is tt good or bad? im not too sure.. but she was really a determined lady.. cos to wait without knowing what is the outcome of it requires lots of faith n courage i guess...
so, if u get to time travel, where will you go to?
For me, I would love to get to know my grandparents better. I would want to meet my parents who are young and witness their lives especially the kampong days. I want to see the baby me. I want to see Singapore gain independence and I want to see MM Lee on the TV. I want to sit on the next table with my ma during her class, to teach her English and Maths(haha). I want to visit my grandma when she was still in China and witness the change in her life after she came to Singapore. I want to go back to the times when my cousins and I are having fun when we are young. I want to see the me who was so happy and enthusiastic to go to school. I remember I was so excited to go to kindergarten at that time. I want to go into future. To see if our IR works. To see if Singapore is as good as it is 50 years down the road. To see if I am still single and to see if my family and friends are still happy and healthy. And perhaps some of my friends are married happily with their children! I really wonder how do they look like. Hehs. I guess I'm thinking too much again.
Alrights, got a call from the company that I was waiting for! =D Shall do more homework for them! Bless me!
got a letter from one of the companies that i went to interview at.. 2nd round.. bt it was a rejection..numb i can say.. disappointed is wat i can describe my emotions... wat am i worth? i dun really know.. even a sales , customer service position i can't even secure... someone told me tt sales position aren't good... and tt we shd get those tt can value addmyself.. such as a process engineer position since im interested in tt field.. yea.. i noe its easy to say tt i shd do something i like instead of anyhow choose something which maybe i can earn abit money but someting i dun like.. all these sound so ideal.. bt am i given the right to choose? do i have the chance to choose? pple say tt life is at ur own hands.. why i can't even feel that control that i can have with wat i want? even a basic customer service position can reject me.. i do not noe where to gauge myself.. i do not know why i have landed myself in this situation.. i did plan wat i wan.. i did try to be more flexible.. bt im in no where now.. am i really tt bad tt theres no where for me? i duno...
n auntie gang wanted to intro some guy to me.. yea i noe most of u gers are attached n u all dun wan to see me spending my life alone... i noe im fat unattractive.. i noe i dun look frenly at all.. i noe the way i talk to pple i sound fierce authoritative although i meant no other meainng.. i noe nobody will ever consider me as their gf.. bt am i really tt cannot make it until i need matchmaking to have a bf when im 23 yrs old? i noe i sound very defensive.. bt tt is really wat im thinking.. for me.. its either i meet the'him' myself or i'll jus stay single forever.. im already prepared for tt.. i really hate the idea of going these kind of matchmaking.. with everyone having tat idea tt they are there to find their lifetime companion.. with this objective in mind.. the them tt i noe will no longer be the natural them.. everything will be so fake.. so unnatural.. to me.. to get to noe someone well is from frens.. its at tt stage tt they will bring out their most transparent side.. if i dun have the chance to be their frens.. i rather stay at some side n observe what kind of person they are.. instead of the going dinner with an objective kind of noeing... maybe im wrong.. i noe im idealist.. im not very open in these kind of situations.. perhaps im jus sore tt nothing seems to be going right for me since a long time ago...
vball.. 03s66.. aj..lionheart.. MAF.. CNY.. late nite trainings .. 'a' ball.. slope running... coro.. prince ..thai noodle hse... auntie gang... spe...ms tey...mr seow ...chan chan... mrs lee... OOF ..mulan... tennis... class vball... captains ball.. napfa.. hiding behind trees during 2.4.. chinese high.. honeydew milk shake.. hokkien mee ..stingray.. chicken pie.. barley uncle... ktv... david tao...jay.. energy... ctsessions... sports matches ..mad hair day.. bballers.. softballers ..netballers... define 'half-life'.. fish tank bottle.. harmonica..syf.. STJ.. JTS.. angel mortal ..wargames.. orientation.. valentines day ..blogs.. 76.. forever late chem lessons.. missing hp.. star gazing aft trainngs ..5-day training... training under rain... arguements ..tears.. teams.. captain.. frens.. muggings.. class bench ...MAF stall... mass dance ..lies... truths.. rose.. spy.. ke ai ji.. bridge.. frisbee.. back injury ..sick bay... timeless clock... huang cheng.. toapayoh sports hall.. snrs.. bishan mac.. entertainment mac..KAP..serene centre.. bukit timah food centre.. 6th ave...tys.. blk tests.. missing discman... 搁浅... 爱很简单..天天.. 爱我别走..寂寞的季节..library.. sch songs.. late.. slping in air con class rooms... napping in halls... stay overs.. chalets.. bbqs... right wing/left wing... lt2.. fac tees...171.. far east.. random ryan at taka.. kino.. horoscope books... book of answers.. labs... chinese appreciation lessons..sentosa..marina bay.. kite flying... indoor vball court during PE..
i noe this is totally random.. jus random tots aft reading somebody's blog tt was back in the 03/04 times in hc... n tt is making me nostalgic..i noe one shd move on.. but somehow i really missed those times.. those times were so tiring n yet enjoyable.. nv really study tt time n it was amazing tt i survived there... bt still somethings can onli be remembered.. stored as memories.. even goin back to sch now everything is different already...no wonder pple call tt sweet 17... oh my tt was 6 years ago.. 4 more years to a decade..
wanted to do some updating bt sometimes there is something wrong with blogger.. like i can't upload pictures n stuff... zzzz anw.. aft so many depressing post.. now are some updates with the events tt i went to...
first... it was kite flying! have not successfully flown a kite up in the sky b4 and it was definitely a interesting experience! so here are the fotos!
first it is the food... clar brought the pizza.. dada bought the chicken wings.. ml brought the jelly.. huay brought the sandwich n me! with the fan tuan aka rice balls.... it seem to be very little of food bt u are wrong! in the end we wasted qt alot of food n i had to throw one box away.. maybe its too terrible.. haha
so this is us sitting at the side with the food... it was an interesting experience and fun too cos there are many pple ard us doing the same thing! jus tt our food seems more feng fu! heh.. the feeling was nice la.. with a grp of frens.. eatting.. lookin up... criticising/complementing the different kites up there... if u think tt kites are onli diamond shapes... u are wrong! there are many many many different types of kites up there... like the neon octopus... ship.. batman..spongebob... and oso some aerodynamically(with a bunch of chem engineers.. we nearly agreed tt it was 'thermodynamically'..it was aw who spotted this mistake..haha) not feasible ones like the sotong...
also.. it was also the celebration for huay's belated bdae... n ml bought my fav cake! hahahha.. it was clar's huay's fav cake too tho tanya hates choc cakes.. hahhaa.. n as u all noe.. it was super windy up at the barage.. n so... we have to stand ard to cover the wind...
we even have to use the kite to do it.. haha.. n huay looking at the cake.. somehow from this angle can feel tt she is smiling happily lei.. haha
then its the lighting of the candles.. a super tiring task.. and here's the bdae ger with the slanted candle .. afterwhich we started off with our kite flying.. heres tanya n dada.. the two onli pple who have flown kites before.. i can still rem the cui experience i had with jc class at the old marina bay.. hahaha.. running frantically ard the field.. with none of our kites went up...so back to tt day.. i tried to fly my kite too.. with the help of tanya.. n it really went high up! tt feeling was superb! hahhaa.. .first attempt n its up! n when it went up.. u will have the hope tt it will go up higher higher n higher.. i even tot that it can reach the height of the batman!(the highest kite there) but.. there are too many kites there.. n many strings ard there too... n so.. my kite's string got entangled and it jus came down... sobs.... we din meet early.. n so our day ended qt fast... coss towards the end there's no wind already.. so here's our grp foto... so to anyone tt happen to read this... 3pm is the ideal time to start! not tt hot n there's wind! 6pm is like theres no wind liao... so very demoralising cos the kite cannot get up! kite flying with food is definitely a interesting experience n good outing for medium size grps! n 2 pple is ideal for 1 kite.. hahha.. too many pple on 1 kite some pple mite feel bored n 1 person on 1 kite mite be too boring.. n on a sidenote.. while i was super engrossed with my kite tt is up in the sky.. i saw someone familiar at the barage.. which reminded me tt jc was 6 years ago.... OH MY! changes happen n i think i've changed more or less too... old liao la!
then last sun.. we went to xx's pl for wii.. yea her pl at buangkok n neo cannot make it cos its too far... sometimes i really wish tt there is some train line tt links up the punggol area with the west! bt it was fun la.. the updates abt our life and the ever tiring wii sessions which makes good workout for everyone... and of cos our usual fb spying.. hahha.. k la not spying bt updates on new pple ard us... n here goes
mich n me.. my new hairstyle! the four of us... xx look super happy! hahhaa mus be the good happenings ard her la... some foto taken while playing wii.. oh man.. real fat...
and.. we started to watch 超级星光大道 at xx's pl after dinner... and there is this guy call 倪安东 who is a american tt is studying in taiwan.. his voice is not the best but its his charisma and his expressiveness which makes all of us go quiet while watching him... his side view is really nice!! so heres the video! enjoy everyone!
got a call from one of the companies that i went for the interview last week.. got into second round.. finally.. gonna have a taste of wat a second round interview is like.. k i dun sound happy do i.. wells.. i do not noe.. totally got no idea how to prepare for this second round of interview cos they say its supposed to be abt technical qtns... how i wish its a process eng position.. oh wells.. seriously i think im in no position to hiam anything.. hope everything will be fine as it gets going.. anw who says i've passed the second interview rite?
met up with tyy n mich today... oh wells.. aft a big struggle by psychoing myself tt i can survive not doing a chem eng related job... im back to the starting pt again.. like wat tyy says.. it is very amazing to see wat u study in the books comes into life... which makes u have the motivation to study more n noe more abt them... yea..tt was precisely how i feel when i went ia .. and this makes me wan badly to be a process eng despite my very cui grades... sigh.. tt feeling is back.. sometimes i really duno shd i blame it on my luck or am i really not up to it..
then recently there are many updates abt pple getting married.. of cos im very happy for them... but during times alone.. i often have this fear.. if nothin bad happens.. by nature my parents will pass away due to old age..as a only child i dun even have any sibling to tok to... i think by hook or by crook i will have a job.. n im pretty sure tt i wun get married and i wun have a bf looking at current situation.. everyone ard me will get married n have their own children...so.. wats left with me.. its jus a job and the hse.. the tot of tt.. is totally scary... wat if i met with some mishaps along the way? there wouldn't be anyone out there to take care of me too... i nv say tt i wan my frens to be ard me always.. to be there for me always.. its like.. ive come to a pt to accept tt.. family and bf/husbands are definitely much more impt than a fren... so watever priorities goes to family and the companion.. which makes me think.. wats the pt of going all out for the frens out there..trying to organise stuff or trying to be thoughtful for them when they onli appreciate wat u do but ultimately when u are down, lonely, low morale there's no one u can go to? now.. i really understand wat one of the frens said is true... maybe i've reached tt kind of age to see some things in another light.. bt i guess i really got to be prepared to spend the later of my life alone.. oh wells.. i guess its the aftermath of UP..bt at least the old man experienced wats love and relationships.. i think i will nv get to experience tt in my whole life... nex lifetime maybe?
to think tt we tot of it at the same time.. at diff places...aft hearing to the plan i was super happy.. somewhere out there.. there is still somebody who share the same passion as me.. i tot i was the only one left standing.. no wonder we are team mates.. i guess its time to lose some weight.. to be able to do my blocking.. n its time to source more team mates! heh
suddenly.. out of the goaless life that i've been spending besides aiming to get a job.. i realise that there are two dreams tt i have at the other side of my mind...
1. to play in opens nex year 2. to set up a backpackers inn in sg..(starting this thinking aft stayin at various backpackers inn in aussie)
with 2 still a long term plan.. need to get the bucks ready n with more plannings and touring overseas to chk it out how other pple do it... interview tml.. good luck to me once again.. bt the teh c peng n the 12 hr of slp last nite seem to be keeping me awake.. wide awake..